My mind realizes what has happened, and its the logical one. It buried the pain quickly and was ready for a time of tranquility and peace, but my heart...my heart still hasn't let go. It makes me angry that my heart and my mind don't travel along the same path, but then again if they did I wouldn't know how to love. Love is felt, and only once you feel it is known to you. Feeling love has such a stronger hold on your heart than knowing love, because when you feel love, truly with your heart -- there are no reservations that it doesn't know. Its all encompassing and all know, it spreads out through your being so that it touches every facet of your life. That is why, when you feel love it is unexplainably joyous; but on the other side of that coin, that is why when you lose love the pain is so great. Of course, there are varying levels of how far the love can spread before its removed, but in my case, I was fully immersed, all encompassed.
Now, I just pray to God to heal my heavy heart; to clear my mind of the sorrow it keeps being reminded of. I pray that you find happiness, I couldn't offer the kind you were looking for, but hopefully he can. I pray you are honest, to the point that it hurts. I hope you don't wait until its convenient to be honest, but be hurtfully honest, brutally. I would rather have that, then to be led to the slaughter. Finally, I pray to the Lord that one day we can be friends, that the hurt will subside and i'll see you just as a friend, and not as the love that was lost.
Hurry up heart, the mind is ready and I want to be ready. I want to be out of this pit of sadness and moving on, so lets make a tag team with Jesus. He'll be there for us, lets trust. We got this, heart and mind.
Anthony
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